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Mental Health and loving people go hand in hand. You will be doing better, the more you love someone.

Trauma affects your design to love others. After being hurt or abused, you may function as if you need to be loved by others, more than loving others.

Most people don't want to feel sad. Why is this? Sadness means you have lost something or someone whom you cannot get back. This is a...

Locating Fear in Your Life Fear. I'm not a fan. "Is this thought from God?" I think we all may wonder this at times, especially if it's a thought of impending doom. What happens when you have a thought about a family member dying? Do you keep your phone close by just in case she calls? Maybe you call her. You respond to a thought of impending doom as if it is reality. It feels as if something bad is happening. The pain with a fearful thought is the confusion of location. Did

Thinking and Being Like God Think. Think. Think. We all do it. You think about the past and feel depressed, or thankful. You think about the future and feel anxious, or excited. You think about a lot of things! It feels as if sometimes you can't "Shut if off." You wake up thinking a lot; at lunch time, thinking a lot; dinner, same thing. Consider this passage: Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea

Confession and Your Relationship with Him What makes it easy to confess to someone? Empathy? I'd rather be known than feel shame? How someone talks to you after you have hurt him can be impactful for future relationships, influencing how you may respond to him, what you believe about being a strong or weak man/woman, and your view of God. What to do after Forgiving Someone 2nd Corinthians 2:5-11 states, "Now if anyone has caused pain, he has caused it not to me, but in some m

What Brings You Closer to God Reading the Bible, praying, going to church, all these things get you closer to God, right? What about counseling? Does this bring you closer to God? What would it be like to be close to God, right now reading this blog? Maybe you are in the parking lot of Trader Joe's reading this blog, sitting on your couch, or about to leave the office. Christian, you are close to God. "But now in Christ Jesus, you who once were far off have been brought near

Couples Issues in Marriage You are one week into marriage with the one you love. You connect, feel like you get along, and think about her constantly. Five months in she starts snapping at you. When you left the house at 8:35am to go to work, you think about what she said last night. "Why did she get so defensive? I was just sharing my opinion." What is the common thread between one week into marriage and five months? He mostly looked at her. When he was served by her, he loo

If you had to put a number on how you're doing, 0 to 10, with 10 being incredible, what would you put? If you were at a family member's wedding what would you put? What about a funeral? A family member's wedding should be a happy time (8 to 10). A funeral should be a sad time (0 to 2). If you have experienced something difficult like losing a job, or never getting what you want in life, then you might stay in the 3 to 6 range, where things are always, "ok" (Even if things are

When is it easy for you to forgive someone? Think about it. Maybe a waiter messes up your food order; that wouldn't (and shouldn't) keep you up at night! What does though? Normally it's the people who you are (were) close to; These could be family members, co-workers, or friends. Tossing and turning, you can't seem to shake the unforgiveness. It is easy to forgive probably because you either don't think or forgot about what happened. It doesn't necessarily mean you forgave b

Good vs Bad in Your Life Sometimes I'll ask a client, "What are some good things in your life and what are some bad things in your life?...

More Blessed to Give Acts 20:35 states, "It is more blessed to give than to receive." We often say someone is blessed because of what...

Anxiety Wants to Speed Up Anxiety wants to speed up; let your mind figure it out and let your body feel it out. If you are anxious about...

Depression and Life When you are struggling with depression you might begin to philosophize about life , the world, relationships, God,...

One Flesh and Conflict Wife: “Why didn’t you have dinner ready when I got home? We’re going to be late for the party.” Husband: Sorry for working so we can eat! And the conflict continues… You hear the words “One flesh” at weddings, church, bible studies, etc; you may even talk about it with your couple friends, but not really sure what this means for you and your spouse. So then, how does “one flesh” apply, especially in conflict? Take the example above. Why didn’t the husba

Remembering Forgiven Sin We tend to hold onto the wrongs we do. You remember what you did last weekend; it was the same thing you did...

Dealing with Hurt How do you deal with someone who has hurt you? You didn’t do anything wrong but he still wronged you. Whether it’s a colleague or a close relationship, you experience suffering when someone has hurt you. Let’s say someone from your workplace said something to you that was hurtful and flat out wrong. You feel attacked. You’re not sure what to do. “Should I quit?!” Many different thoughts might cross your mind. In the midst of these thoughts, you start feeling

The Influence of Relationships with Highs and Lows of Life I believe relationships influence the highs and lows of our lives. A client...

How do you Respond when You are Angry “You make me angry!” What causes you to be angry? Your spouse when she responds a certain way? The...

Do People Change? “Why am I tempted with this again?!” This is very common And we all wonder about this at times. Much has changed in your life over the years, but some things have stayed the same. Maybe you feel like you are the same person you were 10 years ago. Do people change? I love getting to sit with people for weeks or months and witness changes in their lives. There is something that does not change though. Romans 8:13 states, “For if you live according to the fles